"Alina, how do I stay away from work during vacation?"

When you’ve coached for years, you notice some topics are seasonal. Every summer, this same question surfaces.

Even if summer slows the pace, projects and organisational initiatives rarely pause for holidays. Operations must keep running, even when managers are away.

You’ve packed your bags, and your family is thrilled. Yet, your mind drifts back to the inbox or to your last discussion with your client. You worry you missed something urgent, or imagine a client demanding your team changes at the last minute. A knot of anxiety settles in your chest.

You might even scrap your out-of-office reply and stay on “just in case.”

If this sounds familiar, stop. You owe yourself a real shift this year. Otherwise, next summer you’ll face the same struggle. Burnout does not rest, and neither should your plan for true recovery.

Several mindsets keep managers tethered to work on vacation.

These patterns have carried you far. They’ve made you reliable and trusted. They earned you every promotion, every praise from your boss or team. Yet these very strengths become heavy luggage when you genuinely need to switch off and recharge.

The fear of missing critical moments can feel overwhelming, especially if you’re still proving yourself. You worry that an urgent email or unexpected crisis will erupt the moment you log off. You find yourself repeatedly opening your inbox, convinced your immediate response can save the day. Meanwhile, your family patiently waits for you to join in. Moments of laughter and bonding quietly pass by, leaving you sidelined from your own life.

When your identity is wrapped up in your role, every pause feels like losing a part of yourself. Quiet moments on vacation make you uncomfortable, as though stepping away from your role will diminish your worth. You fill this silence by mentally drafting messages, rethinking your strategies, or imagining scenarios back at the office. But the YOU who has chosen to be away on holiday is much more than a manager. You are a partner, a parent, a friend, someone’s child, or sibling. Your true value is never contained solely within your job title or your professional achievements.

Guilt over delegation turns every handoff into a personal dilemma. You hesitate to let others fully take charge, worrying they’ll struggle without your guidance. You check in “just in case,” convinced that your absence is burdening your team. Consequently, you stay bound to your devices, constantly available, never fully free. You carry the emotional weight of unfinished tasks and unresolved decisions into your break, sabotaging your chance to recharge.

A need to control every detail often has you anticipating scenarios long before your departure. You might catch yourself calling hotels to confirm room setups, repeatedly checking weather apps to anticipate disruptions, or renegotiating dinner reservations mid-holiday to ensure perfection. You text clients about minor adjustments to meetings or email colleagues for pre-approval on every small choice. This constant attention to detail may give you temporary peace, but it tethers your mind firmly to the office. Your mental energy remains occupied, stealing away the spontaneous joy and presence that define a truly restorative vacation. Every minor glitch, be it a delayed taxi or a misunderstood instruction at work, feels deeply personal, shaking your sense of security.

Perfectionism paralysis keeps you refining emails or presentations even when lounging by the pool. You feel compelled to achieve flawless execution, no matter how trivial the task. Even away from your desk, you hold yourself hostage to your own high standards. When relaxation proves elusive, you find yourself frustrated, not just at your inability to disconnect, but at your colleagues or clients who “forced” you into corrections and adjustments. The cycle continues, leaving you more drained than before you left.

Spotting these patterns is your first step forward. By recognising how these habits quietly creep into your holiday, you can start to gently loosen their grip. Only then will your vacation become the restful reset you truly deserve.

You’ve finally arrived at your destination, but your mind is still drafting reports. Do you catch yourself checking messages under poolside umbrellas or mentally rehearsing client conversations while your family shares laughter nearby? Are you quietly blaming colleagues for “ruining” your break every time your phone buzzes with another email? Do you feel the weight of responsibility crushing your peace like an overpacked suitcase?

Clearly, you packed more than just your luggage. You’ve unintentionally brought your work along with you. Soon, your resort is crowded, not just with family, but also with your demanding boss, that overly meticulous client, your irritating peer, or your underperforming team member.

You invited them all to your vacation. Without meaning to, your willingness to engage with work-related worries has allowed these figures to occupy your mental space, leaving little room for the people you deliberately chose to spend this special time with.

It’s time to pause, reflect, and deliberately decide whom you truly want to invite or keep along on your holiday.

Healthy habits for a vacation that truly restore your energy

The good news is that real detachment is possible. Managers who successfully unplug have cultivated routines and habits that protect their time, energy, and peace of mind. The shift isn’t complicated, but it does require intention and consistency of practice.

Before You Go

It all starts in January. Sit down early in the year and block your vacation time in the calendar. Discuss and agree on these dates clearly and openly with your manager from the very beginning.
 

Book your flights, hotels, or tickets early. Making this commitment months in advance helps you feel empowered to protect your vacation time and encourages assertive, proactive planning. It gives you peace of mind knowing everything is arranged long before your departure.

As the date approaches, prepare clear out-of-office boundaries and delegate tasks with detailed written instructions. Set expectations transparently with your team, so everyone understands when and how to reach out, but especially when not to.

If you genuinely need a check-in window, schedule one short and clearly defined slot(s) during the week. 

Stick to it.

Actively practice trust: in your people, in the processes you put in place, and in the company’s systems to handle the rest.

While You’re Away

Choose at least one activity every day that keeps you fully present and disconnected. A long, phone-free walk or hike. Reading a book purely for pleasure. A quiet moment with family or friends without checking notifications.

Create simple rituals to mark your transition into relaxation mode. Store your phone out of reach. If you still carry your laptop, turn it off when not in use and put it away out of view.

Turn off all notifications from all your apps (including email) and put your phone on silent mode, especially during meals or outings. These small gestures signal to your mind that you're off-duty.

Remember, effective leaders know their energy is finite. Taking true rest is nothing selfish. It’s strategic for the quality of your life. It’s about safeguarding the energy you’ll need to be performant and effective after you return.

Choose your vacation companion intentionally.

Don't let work demands sneak into your suitcase or hijack your mental space. Your team, clients, and projects will still be there when you return.

This vacation is your chance to reconnect with yourself and your loved ones. It's a rare and valuable moment to truly rest, restore, and refresh. Building valuable memories with your loved ones is far more satisfying than any management result you aim for.

Invite yourself to fully experience this break mentally, emotionally, and physically. Choose one of the healthy habits we've discussed and put it into practice this summer. Commit to making your time away count, not just for your family or your career, but for the most important person you bring along: yourself.

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It’s not unusual to feel uneasy as vacation approaches. You may sense a tightening in your chest when you picture stepping away from your daily responsibilities. Perhaps there’s even some dread about what might unfold while you're away.

But vacations shouldn't trigger anxiety. They're meant to recharge you, to reconnect you with yourself and the people you love. If stepping away causes you more stress than relief, it might be time to explore what’s behind this discomfort.

If your vacation feels more like a burden, let’s talk. Often, simply voicing these concerns can transform worry into clarity. Reflecting on your mindset can create powerful shifts. You owe this shift to yourself. Because you control the balance between what drains your energy and what replenishes it. As a manager, you also have the responsibility to model both productivity and rest. Your team's capacity to recharge depends on the example you set.

How do you handle your vacation? Which of these strategies have you tried, and what surprises or obstacles have you encountered along the way? I would love to hear from you. I learn just as much from your stories as you do from mine.

 If your upcoming holiday feels heavy, reach out. Book a free discovery session, and together we’ll map out practical next steps for meaningful personal growth.

I look forward to continuing this conversation and supporting you on your journey to lasting, meaningful wellbeing in your life.

Until next time, keep thriving!

Alina Florea

Your Management Performance Coach